Outskirts Press, INC.

Abused and traumatized, she overcomes this legacy to realize her true mission.

Abused, traumatized and emotionally shut down, she overcame this legacy to realize her true mission. I am Sweet Water Shadow Woman, and the author of this book. If you are silently suffering emotional pain from past events or avoiding the full self-expression of your innate gifts, my story is for you. It will reveal how the roots of pain take hold, how to overcome resistance to expressing yourself freely, and how to feel loved, appreciated and seen for who you truly are. Walk with me on this path of “unlearning” and “fear busting” into a life of creativity, spirit, connection and joy. This compelling memoir will take the reader from shock, to delight, to hope. It includes short narratives from those who know the author’s work and presence in the world. How she became a vessel for the Divine is a must read, especially for those who are tired of suffering or have denied themselves the full expression of their creative and spiritual gifts. “Sweet Water learned to hide her true nature in a self-made prison of compliance, protection, pain, grief and betrayal. The world, and the people in it, showed Sweet Water what was expected of her. She obeyed until the day her inner Shadow Woman was called forth to help her unlearn everything she had needed to believe in order to survive.” The author’s struggles, courage and journey - to learn through direct experience what was hidden deep inside her - are real.

As time went by I saw the value of doing mental work all day. Obtaining and processing all the paperwork needed to pay people, administering benefits and changes, and working through daily problems that came up kept my attention all day. It exercised the analytical side of my brain which really enjoyed the workout. As a result I was going deeper and deeper into the mystery of how I came to be the way I was – timid, acquiescent, wearing a perpetual smile, yet smart, eager to learn anything, and a great problem solver. With the help of my mother I began to dismantle my ego and deconstruct my emotional armor of protection. Peeling my layers was painful. I always thought of myself as a good girl. My mother was a master coach and guide. She made me find my own answers. I, who was programmed to do as I was told, now had to find the most elusive meaning and information on my own. She somehow maintained a sense of calm detachment which curiously provided me with a feeling of safety. Her focused neutrality helped me to feel I was being supported and not being judged.