Outskirts Press, INC.

Maybe good things come in big packages too...

Being too tall is both a blessing and a curse. From school to sports to dating and beyond, the land of the giants is a place rife with physical, social, racial and emotional struggles. A sense of humor is a must when confronting Lilliputians on your travels. This book is a light-hearted attempt to let the reader in on the secret world of seven-footers.

Waiters and waitresses will size me up as if they’re trying to find a suitable berth for the Titanic. They’ll suggest I might be more comfortable in a booth where my gangly legs won’t interfere with the work flow and trip some unsuspecting bus-boy. I actually prefer a booth, so maybe there is one perk to being too tall after all. When I walk into a movie theatre the patrons pray that the music from the previews doesn’t suddenly stop as I approach the seat in front of them, and then breathe a collective sigh of relief as I pass them by. I like to mess with as many of them as possible by circling like a dog looking for the elusive sweet spot on that giant oversized pillow they use as a bed. When people ask me where I find my clothes, I tell them “In my closet”. When people say “Watch your head!”, I respond “Why, what’s it doing?”. When they ask me how tall I am, I raise my hand to the top of my head, palm down, then extend it over their head and say, “About this tall”, or I’ll just tell them 2.129 meters in broken English. They will return, without exception, a disconsolate “No, really, how tall are you?” You have to get creative, otherwise it becomes a burden.