Outskirts Press, INC.

“Tom Sawyer’s inaugural Barney Moon P.I. novel, CROSS PURPOSES, is the best thing to spread shoe leather on the wise-cracking streets of La-La Land since Bogey and Bacall. And CROSS PURPOSES has Sawyer’s larger-than-life characters, refreshing humor, Hitchcockian plot twists, and his great, so-authentic dialogue.” Andrew McAleer, Author of 101 Habits of Highly Successful Novelists & Fatal Deeds

Manhattan Private Investigator Barney Moon can hack, charm or con his way into or out of damned-near anything. Barney is driven -- to solve cases, nail bad guys, and to anyplace not reachable via the NY Subway. Barney never learned to drive. And, like most born/bred New Yorkers, he regards pretty much anywhere else as “Out-of-Town.” But there is one place for which he has a particular, lifelong aversion: Los Angeles, California, which Barney regards as an Alien Planet. And – guess where he finds himself stranded? In CROSS PURPOSES, a case takes the reluctant Barney and his driver, Al Drobowsky to Los Angeles to obtain a single fingerprint. But things quickly get complicated. That night, of what by then seems sure to be only two in Tinseltown, Al learns he must immediately return to Brooklyn. Next morning, Barney notices his rented car being hot-wired by a young woman. Pragmatically, in exchange for not having Melodie Seaver arrested, he enlists the gorgeous 18 year-old Southern California delinquent to drive him around for – at most – one day. Except that things quickly escalate for this comically ill-matched pair, into murders, conspiracies, and mortal danger. Very fortuitously, the Good News for Barney: Melodie’s driving skills are awesome. Together, our off-the-wall team narrowly survives, and solves the complex, scary mess they’ve stumbled into.

Barney tried to avoid Patricia Owen’s eyes – and, with less success, to not think about how smashing she looked today. “C’mon – how else would he have known? I mean someone—” Patricia scanned the scene beyond her glassed-in suite, as if trying to spot an employee whose look or body language might indicate guilt. “I – I guess I just don’t want to believe that anybody in our office would—” “Hey, not necessarily anyone here. I mean, this guy, he doesn’t set a fire to swindle you guys unless he’s got some heavyweight people after him for at least a piece of that money. People with resources. They could’ve warned him to bail.” Airline records indicated that Rhodes, instead of waiting to head west – with his promised $2.4 million in hand – at 5 PM that afternoon, as he’d planned, he had deplaned at JFK from the red-eye, and minutes later boarded a flight back to Los Angeles. “Or – Rhodes – or someone – was able to hack into your system and learn about the stop-payment.” Then, adding his next, less-paranoid thought: “Or – he’s got new problems back in LA…” “Well, you’ll just have to—” Anticipating the rest of it and desperate to head it off, Barney’s words came fast: “Oh, c’mon. Look, put your guy out there on it – whatsisname – Marty – um…?” “Marty Winslow? No good, I’m afraid. He just got busted for indecency and harassment – coming on to some actress wannabe. He’s been sentenced to probation – and sex addiction therapy.” Patricia caught Barney’s failed attempt to conceal his predictable eye-roll reaction. He settled for an inward groan, followed by: “So what else is new? It’s like everyone out there is some kinda whacko.” He’d always half-figured it was something in the air. “Anyway, Trish, forgeddaboutit. I mean, send me all that way to get a single goddam fingerprint? How’s that gonna look to your in-house bean-counters? Besides…” He jerked his head toward the door. “I’ve got a case I’m working in Brooklyn that’s—” “Bullshit, Barney. We’re looking at what – one – two days max? I mean it isn’t like I’m asking you to – to go to Afghanistan.” “T’you maybe. Like I—” Patricia had resorted – not without a degree of shame – to her proven, seductive smile. And, quickly pouncing on its effect, she compounded her guilt by placing her hand on his. “Look, I’ll send Al along with you. And the good news for me – I’ll know you won’t be foot-dragging to pad expenses. Besides, what’re we looking at? You collect that print, match it, and we’re both off the hook – case closed. How hard can that be forgodsake…?” Barney looked down at her hand, then into her eyes. Oy…