Don't try to make a relationship be what you want it to be; let it be what it is. If a person says he/she loves you, believe their actions. If the person says he/she does not love you or does not want a commitment, believe their words. (Don See, 2006)
"Yesterday is gone; today is forever and tomorrow is never; live today" (Don See, 2007).
"You did what you did, it happen, it's over; get over it. It's wasn't me! (Don See, 2007)
Some research has indicated that women have sex for love and men have sex for sex. It has been concluded that when a woman has sex with a man it is because she has some emotional feeling for him and that “she longs to bond with him.” She wants to be emotionally vested in that man. However, that scenario appears to be changing. Women are having sex for sex and testing the market to determine their skill as a lover, and whether they are and can be loved. Women appear to be taking on the same values as many men. They are having sex for sex to protect themselves from being hurt. The emotional impact that sex once had for some women has changed, whereas some women are no longer emotionally vested, putting themselves in the position to be hurt. The goal of most couples is to love and be loved, but, if either a man or woman has been hurt, their guards are often up to protect themselves from further hurt. In an effort to be whole and to prevent hurt, many male and females are no longer allowing sex to have the power it once had, or for it to be the emotional tool controlling them. Sex is sex for some people and a controlling mechanism for others.
About Donald J. See Jr., Ph.D.
Donald J. See Ph.D. is a consultant for Willie S. Williams and Associates, an instructor
at Cuyahoga Community College in Cleveland, Ohio and President of Another View,
LLC, a multi-service agency. Don See is a Licensed Independent Social Worker;
a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor and a Licensed Independent Chemical
Dependency Counselor and a Substance Abuse Professional for the State of Ohio.
He is in private practice and provides clinical counseling services to individual,
couples and families. He also works with persons addicted to drugs; victims and
perpetrators of domestic violence and of various sexual orientations. Don See has
worked in the mental health fi elds for over twenty years.
Don See provides training to Governing Boards, develops family centers, conducts
program evaluations of organizations and assesses quality and utilization of services
and personnel development in organizations. He also conducts training in program
development, managed care, welfare reform, mental health, chemical dependency,
cognitive therapy, human development and working with the homeless. Additionally
he has provided training for medical records control and documentation, development
of treatment plans, quality assurance, sustainability, cultural diversity, team building
and proposal writing. Lastly, he provides policy and procedure development, write
Don't try to make a relationship be what you want it to be; let it be what it is. If a person says he/she loves you, believe their actions. If the person says he/she does not love you or does not want a commitment, believe their words. (Don See, 2006)
Donald J. See Ph.D. is a consultant for Willie S. Williams and Associates, an instructor